In these trying economic times, there’s a growing movement of people who are saving thousands and thousands of dollars every year just by thinking.
“I never thought about it before,” John, 32, says, ironically, “But it’s amazing how much money you can save when you think about it. For example, the other day, I was sitting on my couch and I needed to turn on the light in the living room. But the light switch was over on the wall and I was over here on my couch and so I couldn’t reach it,” John explains. “I know, right, first world problems. Normally I would have jumped into my car and gone out to buy one of those smart phone controlled light control systems I’ve seen on TV so I wouldn’t have to sit in the dark all the time… but then I then I started thinking. And I felt this idea came into my head, like a headache, but with pictures! My-reka!, I yelled, and instead of getting into the car, I saw in my mind how could walk over to the light switch at the wall, reach out with my finger, and switch on the light myself. It was amazing. It worked.”
Just like John, who like most fictitious characters in popularized non-fiction only has a first name for pedagogical reasons, other people have also reported on the amazing money-saving results they’ve been able to achieve just be thinking. Some have experimented with making their own breakfast. “You know, I used to buy my breakfast everyday, $5.99 for an egg and a muffin, and it was costing me tons of money, but then I started thinking. When you think about it, frying an egg is really not that hard. So now I just do that and I’m saving more than $2000 each year”, Jane told your intrepid reporter. Like John, Jane is fictitious yet highly pedagogical as well. I just made up the name because writing this article is fun and illustrates a ridiculous yet subtle point, but I digress…
There are now countless blogs on the internet where people report on how much money they save just by thinking. Even the mainstream is catching onto the thinking movement albeit perhaps a bit belatedly. The amazing thing is that anyone who wants to can save money just by thinking. It’s just that we as a nation haven’t been thinking for a while.
Some people report having experimented with thinking in high school but how they stopped doing it because thinking made them unpopular with the other students. In some cases thinking too much even led to bullying. As they grew older they never considered started thinking again, because it was easier to just go shopping. Others claim they think during the work day and so when they’re done, they just want to reward themselves by spending all the money they just made. When I pointed out that… well, the obvious, they started thinking.
“Thinking is like the compound interest I used to pay on my mortgage,” Joe, 45, also fictitious, says. “I find the more I think, the more ideas I get and the better they get. Now I save tons of money. In fact, over the past year I’ve saved $35,000 I was previously spending on pool bills, the daily fireworks show, and disposable finger-extenders to switch the lights on.” In general, people start thinking about little things, like how to fry an egg or figure out how to save on the cell phone plan and then start thinking bigger and bigger.
When people first start thinking, friends and family are often concerned. Many believe that thinking leads to unhappiness and that it’s hard to enjoy life when thinking too hard or even if one is thinking at all. After all, ignorance is a bliss, just like it says on the front door of the Student Loan Department. Many people who think a lot therefore try to hide it.
Others believe that too much thinking is unpatriotic and that the economy might collapse if too many people start thinking too much. Some even believe we have a duty to avoid thinking. After all, isn’t mindless spending the very foundation of the economy? Indeed, the only foundation, especially to someone who hasn’t done a lot of it [thinking, that is]. The usual answer is that most people will never start thinking anyway, but if they do the economy will just change into something more rational than mindless spending.
If you want to learn more about how you can save money just by thinking, stay tuned for more blog posts!