What the upper class tells their children is probably even worse. I came across a state that said 37% of children of upper class parents fall out of that strata. Imagine how much worse it is to always compare yourself to your parents and falling short — because it’s the American expectation that next generation will do better than their parents.

This is response to the your question about what upper class people tell their children:

(My operational definition of upper class is what the New York Times says, not my personal definition of that class.)
Upper class people tell their children that they need to achieve at least the same level of success or surpass it. Lawyers, doctors, and engineers beget the same. Successful businessmen instill the same lust for money in their children so that they cannot imagine living without luxury.

It is very possible that 37% do fall out of the strata. This can be because of unsustainable spending habits, such as new smartphones every month and thousand-dollar purses every few days. It can also be because the kids crumple under the stress of being expected to perform relatively well. They become pleasure-seeking potheads (or whatever other drug tickles their fancy). There are trust fund babies who lose access. There are inheritances that are lost as the business cycle does its cruel work. There is a multitude of reasons for that fact.

I think that you can optimize being kind. It’s about putting yourself in the correct circumstances or creating a situation where your kindness spreads as much as possible.

Beginning in 2004, I often would pick up my grandaughter from school, to assist my daughter, who was very busy with her self-employment.
There would be three lanes of people picking up the kids, and it was well regulated and monitered.
The first year, I noticed most parents would show up for their kids in a 2003-2004 Chev Tahoe. In 2005, the majority had traded to the 2005 Chev Suburban. Then in 2005 (late year) the rage was the Cadillac Escalade. Later the next year (2006) it was a smaller, yet more expensive Lexus SUV or equivalent. This is a small factor of life, but I thought it played to what your post is about. I guess in ’06 the “middle class” had decided that the fuel crisis had justified a more expensive, yet smaller vehicle. Of course there were a few folks driving outdated vehicles, there always will be. But for the cheerleaders parents and the football stars parents, it had to be the latest and greatest. These kids will grow up expecting the same lifestyle. Therefore they will need to move into a paying occupation to support such a lifestyle at some point. These kids will not benefit from the information of freedom from middle class imprisonment and toil that is advocated by the posts on your blog. It is the responsibility of the parents to exit this way of life, and then teach their kids what is a better way. The vehicle thing is just a part of what is wrong with society. You could go on to discuss their heavily mortgaged homes, other toys, etc. The middle class corporate/working scheme is to be but an illusion of “the lifestyle to have”. Personally, I am not one of its prisoners, but I am not sure how to convey the benefits of “exiting” to those that don’t want to hear it.

That should have read:

Productivity not equal to Accomplishment.

Jacob

If everybody stopped valuing money, I think that the objective standard of living would decline. With less people motivated to do productive work, who would do the activity necessary to sustain our standard of living?

@patrick – I think we would all have to ask what your definition of “objective standard of living” is before a meaningful answer can be given.

If it means having a clean and safe living environment with plenty to eat, then I doubt there would be a decline.

If it means having the opportunity to spend money on a new plastic organizer bin, select from 35 models of lawn mowers, or carry a cellphone that plays music videos and takes pictures, then yes, I’d expect a decline.

I certainly agree it’s desirable to not be trapped into a job just for the income it brings. But I would suggest that rather than simply escaping work into your own world, why not see if you can find a job that meshes with your talents and inclinations, so that your work time flies and you really enjoy getting up Monday morning? It took me awhile but I did find my bliss.

Over the years I found out that I’m not a people person and am way too cynical and moody to make an effective manager. What I excel at and enjoy is solving puzzles, crosswords, code breaking, chess positions, you name it. It turned out that a frank discussion with my director changed my life, because my company has a deep need for the kind of skill that I have. So my entire meeting schedule vanished and I’m now working in my own sandbox on my own hours and on whatever weird problems the company confronts that no one else dares touch due to the “risk of failure” but that I take a gander to. Typically the issue is something involving detective work, identifying the key clues and applying logic to design a series of experiments to isolate a problem. Then other folks run my orders, get me the results, and voila, problem solved (well, more often than not anyway, but I don’t fret about it, and management is careful to stoke my ego no matter the outcome).

My advice is to not immediately give up on the corporate world, there might be something out there ideally suited for you, try to find it and don’t be afraid to ask. Of course this is only easy to do when you are financially independent, otherwise you may end up derailing your career. Execute Jacob’s 5-year plan, then hand in your ultimatum instead of your resignation, and see what your company can do for you.

Duke, you are getting filthy rich working for a fucking hedge fund.

I meant to type dude, my mistake. I thought you were a quant at a hedge fund. I am just trying to reconcile your attitudes toward money, job choice, and frugal living. Are your plans to donate it at some point or spend it on yourself over time, in which case you would not have to be frugal considering you are FI as it is.

Filthy rich, to me, is simply being very very rich. Personally I think rich people & institutions are stupid if they invest in hedge funds considering they typically cannot beat a simply passively managed index fund. This was Warren Buffet’s bet some years back and he was correct. Actively managed funds have too many fees. Of course, years ago the situation was not quite the same but that was when insider trading rules were not enforced so much.

Is very important to recognize that money is not the end all developing ones self is definitely worthwhile. If society had more space for it, I think a lot more people might choose a very different path than the traditional middle class ideal.